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July 28, 2026
Scriptures General

A discussion on how selflessness is vital in marriages, drawing lessons from the pastimes of Lord Rama, Sita Devi, and Sudama Brahmana.

The Balance of Marriage

If in marriage we focus only on what we need and ignore the needs of our partner, the relationship cannot last. One who is self-controlled does not need to lord it over another, nor be overpowered. Marriage is a balance between satisfying self and satisfying partner. It requires putting our needs aside to satisfy the other's feelings.

Sita Devi's Chaste Insistence

The first duty of a chaste woman is to carry out the order of her husband. Yet in the Ramayana, when Rama ordered Sita to remain in Ayodhya, she insisted on accompanying Him to banishment. Rama gave up His vision of a safe life for Sita to please her, and Sita gave up a comfortable life to be with Him. Reason and logic were tempered by needs and feelings.

Sudama and the Inability to Hear

Selfishness makes us deaf to another's voice. When Sudama Brahmana's wife suggested he visit Krishna in Dwaraka, she was concerned for her husband, not personal comfort. Sudama went to see the Lord and to satisfy his wife. When differences are humbly honored, husband and wife find room for spiritual growth.

By Visakha Dasi
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